Counting My Blessings

There comes a time where we tend to be too involved in our daily routines that we overlooked on the nitty gritties. It would be good if we could, once in a while, paused for a little while and look back, appreciate the moment and count our blessings.

I wouldn't say my life is a perfect one now, but at least I am contented with it, as I should be. I can honestly say that I have been blessed in life and been given a lot of love which I am more than grateful for. I'm glad for this chance to be grateful to those who form a part of my life.

Frankly speaking, while I realized I could feel envious over what others possess or achieve, I could at the same time be the envy of others. Having lived in where I am now, as compared to the rest of the world, just that alone, I'm thankful enough. Although I'm 'hit' with humid summer all year long, at least I do not have to bear with the fear of any natural disasters at all.

When I look around me, I see love from those who care. Friends come and goes, the worthwhile one stays. I'm glad for that. Through bad times, there are some who emerged true to the word 'friendship'. I take this chance to individually say thanks at this little corner of my personal blog, whether or not they know, or in time to come, it doesn't matter. It definitely feels good to know yet again now, I appreciate and I am contented with whatever I have and whoever I'm with. This post, could really be the best representation to what I feel towards the people I love, with bond so strong that I feel the need for the existence of this post. And there you go, the loves of my life.....

Mummy: As I affectionately call her, throughout my 26 years life (minus the first few years where I don't know how to mumble a single word YET), and I bet the first word I ever said would be 'Mama'. The strongest pillar of my life where no one could ever replace. She spent her childhood and teenage 'dreams' in poverty, yet giving away her youth to both her sons, which in turn affect her health at the later stage of her life. I can't help but feel an obligation to lighten her burden now as I'm all grown up. Let her enjoy a little of her life, yet restricting her to whatever she shouldn't. Her selfless effort in bringing her sons up will always be remembered and I ought to repay it through my filial piety now. I count my blessings that I have her by my side now and of course in time to come, and I'm thankful to her for being the best mother I can ever have.

Father: As a father figure, he needs to impose his stern and strict teachings. Although not very highly educated, he was the pillar in the entire family. We (the whole family) had a rather good life in our younger days where he, being the only sole breadwinner, was able to bring back more than just bread. He insisted my mother to be a full time homemaker, while he slogged his guts out. It was until my late teens that he started to dissolve his strict teachings, probably much due to the fact that both his sons has already grown up, allowing him to step down a little. By then, times became harder and life became simpler but nevertheless, we are just as happy a family. I am thankful to him for those painful canings that he gave throughout my younger days made me who I am today.

Brother: As the younger one, he grew up feeling much more loved. He's more lovable as compared to me. In comparison with analogy, he was the Ferrari while I'm just a Toyota. Being bright and clever, our roles switched at times where I would look up to him in the aspect of studies. I hold him proud of what he did and what he is capable of academically. We grew up being very close and I’m glad this tie has matured into a special kinship that we actually cared and loved each other in silence. Like they say, blood is thicker than water and the bond between us proved that strongest. I’m glad for a childhood companion, one who grew up with me relentlessly, through quarrels and plays up until now, one whom I will always look after, silently.

Girlfriend: 2nd woman in my life. My mum once told me, "your girlfriend is going to be your wife, whom in turn is going to replace me when I’m gone". Indeed, I feel the need for this special someone to fulfill this role and I found one whom I’ll never let go. She is the one who made me believe in love, once again. She is the one who made me feel a different type of love, one that I couldn’t find anywhere on anyone else but her. She is what I’m not, and in a way, she completes me. She loves me the way she does, all because she believes in telling me what I need to hear, and not telling me what I want to her. The way she love, reminds me of the relentless effort of my mother, where my shortcomings is purely a part of me and she has long accepted it. To me, I’m blessed. Blessed with someone whom I can trust and give me utmost to, for once, I am sure, my future is her.

Best Friend: My childhood playmate after my brother. I’m always puzzled how someone can claim that they have more than one best friend. Isn’t BEST a singular word? For me, this best friend brings out the best in me in a special way. We grew up together in a funniest way ever possible. I remember a simple quote that goes “a best friend shares good times and help you out by listening to you during bad times”. This person definitely made me feel that he’s there when practically those you need to be there isn’t. He tells me things I don’t want to tell myself. To me, he is like a sister that I never had, because I can practically poured anything to him. It would definitely be impossible for this special bond if not for all the things we loved – games, soccer, movies etc. This bond I have, is rare and precious for I know who will be there standing as my best man when I become the groom.

Xero4: Our friendship hails a long way through, so long, I can barely remember why the name ‘Xero4’. We shared countless woes and done the wackiest thing together. There was even a particular that times seem to fly because every weekend will be Xero4 week. We clubbed, chased movies like never before, played countless games of pool and PES etc. Common hobbies definitely keep bonds tied I must say. A Chinese saying goes ‘在家靠家人, 在外靠朋友’, there’s definitely nothing more than pure truth in that saying. We shared joy and woes we don’t normally share with our parents and definitely, we’ve grown from young boys to young adults and finally now, a grown up where our interests, hobbies and the things we did changes along as we grow as well, but one thing is for sure, the bond remains the same.

Mixed Rice: It’s funny how my closest of friends revolves around those from my Secondary School, probably, all I can say is, that school is where it impact my personal life the most. It’s a pity I missed the times where Mixed Rice was formed, but I’m glad it’s never too late to be a very part of them once again. I always thought just one close group of friends is good enough, but it’s not true until Mixed Rice came along. They were a whole lot of different fun. Comparably, I can say Xero4’s the Ferrari and Mixed Rice’s the Volkswagen Beetle. But within this group, there’s a huge variations of traits, from the fun-loving, to the crappy ones to the always sleeps around etc. I'm glad for this friendship going so strongly and expanding where the trust and bond we had with each other is tremendous.

This post couldn't be more timely as I've marked this post on my 26th Birthday where I shared some of my most inner feelings. Like I've shared, it’s not easy finding love, it’s even harder to maintain it. I’m glad for the kinship and friendships I have right now, and definitely it has been a very part of my 26 years. These important people add love to my life, and paint my life rainbow when it’s black and dull. I doubt I have the courage nor chance to say this personally to each and everyone of them, but whatever it is, these words from the bottom of my heart will and shall remains, something I held on so dearly now and I hope to bring them to my grave when I breathe my final breath.

With utmost love,
Your son, brother, soul-mate, friend.

Love Nest

To be rather honest, I really find the entire system in Singapore screwed up in terms of home building as well as the way it manages young couples. The path from singlehood to forming a family is by no means easy in Singapore context. Singapore is the first and only country I’ve heard, where young couples (well, most of them) get a flat first before getting married. Imagine inking your signature on documents after documents informally. The thought and consideration before that, definitely has got to be serious and thoughtful.

I had never imagined myself in this situation, even though I’ve long surpassed the age I longed to see myself settling down. It was a tough decision back in February because afterall, both of us are relatively new in our relationship. To tell the truth, we’re kind of glad we didn’t manage to get the February BTO back in Segar Vale. Nevertheless, as time passed, both of us know and had some thing in common. We have each other in mind, we see each other as the one whom we want to spend our lives with. Quite frankly speaking, I didn’t expect myself to think and feel the way I do, because I used to be such a childish and playful person. Handling a relationship and failing one definitely make me face the real music. Relationship is more than just love to me. It’s commitment, trust and understanding, which would allow two to continue to grow and go hand in hand, side by side. And definitely I reckon time has come, for me to make this major decision and commitment.

Of course, being where we are, having just worked purely for a few years, being CPF rich is the way to go. Cash poor wouldn’t even get you a kennel over your head. Therefore, purchasing our first BTO, even if we can afford it, is really a huge commitment. Me and the girl has discussed this umpteen times before we derive into a conclusion. That goes to show it is by no means easy task in choosing our love nest. Application process is easy, yet the tough task came only after the queue number was released. The queue number was released in advance. Though we got a rather lousy number the first time round, the second time was slightly better. Slightly only. We fall within the 100% percentile but unfortunately, we’re nearing the 93% percentile. Which means we NEED people to drop out or reject before we even get our chance on our ideal flat.

Few things we take into consideration. As we always thought, the sun in the morning could be a concern, but that thought change when the location of both Meadows and Palmview revealed that LRT could be a disaster affecting our love nest. Definitely, that dampens our mood. We were demoralized by that queue number, fearing that we might have to face a situation of choosing a sun-facing unit or facing the music of the LRT. Of course, something common we had in our mind ensures that Meadows was our first option because of its flooring offerings – Timber Planking for bedrooms and Ceramic Tiles for living room. That’s definitely our favourite plus an ideal location, we rejoice at the fact that there’s this option yet fearing that our chance to even pick an ideal flat at that project might not even come. True enough, within weeks from the start of the selection, we could literally see the choices selected applicants has made were skewed towards Meadows.

As times passed us by, we started making back-up considerations on Palmview. Never mind the flooring because we had decided to do it on our own. By the time selections for Meadows seems dim, drop out rate gradually increase as well. Increasing our chance and making us really believe we might just have the chance to get our ideal flat. One by one, we started on the proximity consideration, following by the height above ground level. We eliminated all 2nd to 4th storey units because we believed those are for the Malays and of course, too noisy for human beings to comfortably live in. Next up, the distance away from LRT and expressway. The sound produced from Expressway wouldn’t be as noisy (irritating too) as those noise from the LRT. Nevertheless, we are trying our best to avoid those areas.

Now here’s the fun part. We constantly monitor the queue number for weeks, including the availability of the units. At the same time, girlfriend has been hardworking enough to strike off units after units based on what is reflected from the HDB website. Suddenly, HDB website became one of the most visited websites from us. Eventually, we started ranking the units based on our liking after taking into consideration the sun direction, distance away from expressway, LRT and carpark. Honestly, up until the day or even on that day itself, we can still changing our preferences. We had a hard time convincing and justifying on the reason why we chose one unit over the other, but definitely is fun. Can’t imagine something so important and serious can be so fun at the same time. I reckon it’s all part and parcel of it.

On the day itself, we finally arrived at the HDB Hub, for a very different and special reason. Constantly, our mobile’s on, with the HDB app constantly reflecting from the screen, while at the same time, we had our eyeballs on the queue call counter. The wait was long, even though it’s only a matter of minutes. Can you now feel the anxiety in us? Finally, our queue was called and off we went into this room (I reckon we will only step foot in this room once in our entire life) where staff sit side by side with partitions in between them. We settled down and was served by this guy who was patient with us throughout and definitely allowed us to understand better the entire process. And so, we opted for the inclusions and exclusions accordingly and signed on papers after papers. It brings a surreal feeling as though we were signing on marriage papers. I cannot believe what I’m doing at some mere moments.

Leaving the room was an assurance to me. An assurance to work for the future I want to build with the very girl who was in the room with me. I’m glad me and the girl already has a plan in mind and we are definitely working towards creating our future together with this milestone set, we’re set to walk hand in hand, side by side.

Westlife Gravity Tour

I never believe in POP concerts, since the younger days where Mandarin Pop ruled Singapore briefly before this little city was invaded by international POP with the likes of Britney Spears who took the world by storm. Gradually, we saw the upcoming and rise to stardom of pop boybands such as N Sync, Backstreet Boys and Westlife. We saw how they captured the hearts of the crazy teenage girls and even the teenage boys went crazy and followed them through physical appearance such as hairdo.

I vaguely remembered being part of that craze by purchasing their albums, and memorizing every single song from their albums. No doubt, they were around our ears for a good one decade. And gradually, they silently left us. N Sync were totally gone by the time I passed my teen old days, Backstreet Boys made several appearance thereafter and only Westlife stood still yet silently. They were the ONLY pop band that is still alive since my teenage days and I reckon there is every reason why they still stood far and famous.

Hailed from Ireland, with their deep Irish culture and vocals, they have captured and retained the hearts of us and the Gen Y, and possibly attract new bloods from the Gen Z (I called it). A decade plus of music from Westlife definitely left a deep impression for me. A tip of my fingers and there I go, able to sing some of their really nice and famous songs such as My Love, I Lay My Love On You, Fool Again..etc…It even became some of the flurry love songs which has deep and meaningful lyrics that really makes love feel, really out of the world. And so, because of the mentioned, I’ve decided to watch this very concert, because they are possibly the only pop boyband I’ll ever like in my life.

Needless to say, they did not disappoint. Never mind the embarrassment we had after the girl cutely makes a mistake on the seat number. The wait was rather significant but definitely worth it. A small bet we made before the curtain was skewed towards the girl’s bet. And there we go, watching 4 ever so familiar guys waving at us and started singing. It felt as though I’m back to my younger days. No doubt, it definitely made me feel young.

Love the way they make me feel. Apart from their classics, they went on to sing some songs from their latest album ‘Gravity’ which I’m damn proud and glad I’ve heard umpteen times of that album, especially when they sang ‘Safe’ and ‘I Will Reach You’. That’s not all, when they did covers such as ‘S&M’ from Rihanna and even ‘The Time’ from Black Eyed Peas, which is simply cool stuff. Love their vocals as it still sounds as dynamic yet soothing at the same time.

Nice encore they have to end their concert on the beautifully set stage which has stars sparkling and different visuals all around. Not only that, I’ll never forget how engaging they tried to made their fans and I can greatly feel how much they appreciate us fans. Blame it on them, that I’m their followers on twitter on top of being a loyal fan. And I’m proud to say that I’m a Westlife fan and always be one for as long as they continue to sing…till then….

Gastronomia in Malacca

I’ve heard so much about Malacca since I was young. I was probably a mere teen age when I first heard about Malacca being a small little state, rich in history and of course, its colonial existence. It wasn’t until the spread of the love for their food there that captures my interest for this little place. Known for its historical architecture, my mere impression of this place are little red buildings, standing just inches away from each other, making the entire town a red picturesque.

My chance to visit this much known yet unknown place came when I chanced upon a deal in Dealguru under yahoo. I must say, these promotion mechanics happening everywhere now is really beneficial to us, but unfortunately, hurting to the business, but frankly speaking, who cares. The girl termed me kiasu when I zoomed down to the travel agency on the day the promotion was reflected. Can’t really blame me because I have restricted dates, just as much as the promotion itself.

And so, there we went on a good getaway amidst/after our busy period. We definitely reckon a 4 hour coach ride wouldn’t do much ‘damage’ to us. Even my luggage was packed only at the very last minute. That goes to show how ‘prepared’ we were for this very light-hearted getaway. The coach ride was smooth, accompanied by my ever-so-important iPhone, with music blasting from Singapore to Malacca, straight!

When we arrive, the weather was killing. Less humid yet the sun was harsher to our skin. Our ill-preparation before the trip cause us to kind of lost our way, while wanting to look for that famous chicken rice ball. Thankfully, for a rare Chinese speaking local, we managed to drag our tired body under the killer sun to find that chicken rice ball store, finally! Queue was insanely mad when we got there, and by the time we joined the queue, the piercing heat got the girl so frustrating that she went metres just to buy an umbrella. It was a relatively long queue before we got to our turn and I went ‘finally’ over that chicken rice ball. We increased the number of balls from 10 balls to 15 balls (too hungry due to the queue). Their servings is pretty much standard. Either you get half a chicken or one full chicken, followed by chicken rice balls in the multiple of 5. In no matter of time, we are done with our food and we went on in search of yummy Gula Melaka or Chendol.

With an umbrella on hand, we take our time before deciding not to torture our legs and just settle for somewhere nearer. The Chendol was awesome yet heavenly. Strong sweet taste from the brown sugar, makes the Chendol even more appealing and delicious than ever. With our bodies feeling lethargic, we headed for some photo taking around this small little town before we took a much needed nap. The bed was comfy all because it was a double bed. (One can never understand how difficult it is to get a double bedding request because most operators/travel agents/hotelier alike will simply ignore your request. Therefore, just a tip for everyone, if you ever request a bedding request to a travel agent, chances is that your request will be ignore. Back in where I am, such requests are considered additional word and we simply lied over it. Therefore, should you even want to complain to the travel agent about your bedding request, forget it, because a sentence like “I’ve already told you it’s only upon request, subjected to availability” would have bring you down.)

With soccer action at night, we wasted no time in getting our dinner. Little did we knew that Jonker Street has stores closing as early as late afternoon, and we were very lucky to be able to patronize a store which sells noodles and really awesome desserts. By the time night falls, we can see hawkers laying their makeshift area, cordoned nicely beside the walking path along Jonker Streets. When the dark totally coincides, Jonker Street turns into a buzzling street with food as the main highlights. You can literlly see hawker displaying their culinary masterpiece ranging from Otah to Carrot Cake to even ice pops. Definitely, I sense a hinge on what is it like being a child back in my parent’s younger days where it’s very kampong.

To perfect our soccer watching action, we accompanied it with lots of food. We even had a taste of their Macdonald porridge and Fried Chicken which easily outwin that of Singapore’s KFC’s. We spread the food across the dinner, blasted the TV out loud and off we went, enjoying life like never before. It wasn’t until the first yawn from a full tummy that we realized we had watched two matches back to back. Thank god for Star Sports and ESPN in the hotel. One would and could never image how worse it can get watching local channel when you don’t even understand a single word they are saying due to the language.

Next day was pretty much spent eating and sleeping as we lazed our way until check out. To be honest, 1 night in Malacca is good enough, just for a short getaway away from the hustle and bustle of rubbish Singapore. I swear I’ve gained weight just from this trip alone. However, it’ll probably be some time later before I re-visit this little town again, but one thing’s for sure, Malaysia still has what Singapore no longer have. And because of that, I’m pretty sure short getaway will continue to be on my travel agenda. Till next time…..

R.I.P Steve Jobs

"Death is very likely the best invention of life. All pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure, these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important." - Steve Jobs

Huge Dilemma

I can't help, but simply feel that I'm really STUCK at the crossroads. It's no simple route by any means. On my left, it’s the tangible items that attracts (2 months of wages with 13th month bonus), on my right, it’s the prospect of career advancement with a better salary payout.

Being where I am now, I chose to blame my company for poor Human Resource management. The lack of review in its remuneration of existing colleagues, especially more so for subsidiary. It doesn't work on the basis where a subsidiary level colleagues should be treated differently in the very first place, not even to mention how biased they can be.

To put it simply, I'm underpaid, and that makes it very difficult to me to request or expect my salary to be on par with the market, alongside with my fellow graduates so to speak. To be honest, this stepping stone that I initially thought proved to be a huge mistake. I felt that the longer I stay, my value depreciates even further.

That has dealt me a great blow. Had I known it earlier, I would have left. But the prospect of learning what I need for future, kept my heart and soul. Unfortunately, my hopes of depending on that one person who can guide me and teach me, failed me thoroughly.

There I went, bent and set on leaving. It's back to the bad old days where job searching is definitely draining me mentally and eating up my precious time. But that's the only way to go, as I come to realize this harsh truth.

Job searching, going for interview etc are such a mental torture. It leaves you with too much an uncertainty to bear, which actually translate to various negative feelings. But having said that, the good thing is, my source of income is still intact.

Time wait for no one, especially for people like me. To take this chance, while I still have that drive, passion and strength in me, I ought to think for myself, to prevent myself for really wasting my own time because whatever I am doing now, is simply not productive and it doesn't gain me experience I require. It's definitely time to move on now...i reckon, for now, I'll still have to perform that mental torturing routine