NA

I was disappointed at that sms. Initially, i had thoughts of rejecting that trip because i was afraid that i'll be alone. In the past, i have letters accompanying me, i can go online and made online calls but now, not anymore. Nevertheless, i decided to go because i think that i should really go there and relax, trying to make a brand new start. But sadly, the whole trip was cancelled.

Today was a tough day for me. So many ups and downs of emotions for me and i almost couldn't take it. Those words was harsh to me, and it was really hurting. But like what many said, the truth hurts. It's hard getting someone whom you love out of your life entirely. Neither do i want to do that. But then again, i couldn't bear the thought of seeing someone i love doing things which might make me feel upset.

I'm also another one left hanging on the air and mind it, it has been one and a half months. I could barely tell myself to be strong and stand up any longer. Nobody can have the best of both worlds and in any case which i think i have to give in so that someone can be happier, i will. In any case which i think i have to do something so that at the very least, i can sleep much better at night, i will.

What i did today in school, those actions are nothing but for real. Especially the last action before i actually set foot and left. But i supposed that might be the last time i did that.

Yes, time will tell you everything, but perhaps by then, things are not the same and it's all a little too late.
What you said makes sense, perhaps, i'm not the better guy.
But i'm sure i am the one who knows you best, knows you well and love you always.